Cinders' story

 HI. I love my American parents sis and bro Perkins! They are so nice and took so good care of me while I was in Payson! :) Now I am back at my Swedish sister Ellinor! :) My ma here (sis Perkins) told me that 1/3 of the missionaries either leave the church or become inactive after their missions. THAT IS JUST SO SAD. I cried a bit, not gonna lie. So some missionaries might think I am too much of an active member to want to be seen with me or are embarrassed by me?!? Who are these people?!? I am just flabbered in the ghast... Of course I can understand some of the thoughts they might have but embarrassed by me?!? NO thanks. And one more thing which my mom said: "It's a little weird that some of these missionaries you (me, Cindy) tried to help, invited into your home and took care of FAR AWAY FROM HOME, your parents (my parents) invited them and fed them and we all had spiritual and other nice experiences with. They don't invite you to their home, they don't even want t...

 Good morning from Payson! Today I am leaving the Perkins's home and going back to Ellinor, my friend from Sweden who lives in Pleasant Grove. I have loved staying in both places. Here the Perkins's are the age of my parents (roughly) and I call this HOME and I call them MA and PA :) I am so happy to be their bonus daughter, they are so nice and spoil me with Pepsi! I visited their ward on Sunday and I felt like I could fit well into their relief society lol. I even went to the temple with the relief society president and we went shopping yesterday to Deseret Book in Spanish Fork. About that... I saw an elder leaving the store and I got a feeling and a thought in my head: "Talk to that elder, he is going to Finland!!!"  But I didn't do it. I ignored the prompting. I feel so bad about it still... But I know his name is Olsen/Olson and that he is from Arizona! :) It is so fun that I at least saw him. I am still kicking myself about it though... Life is Tough LOL. I ...

 Hello there!  I am happy today. The sun is shining, it is a little bit too warm but I can handle it... I took a nap for over an hour and it worked miracles. I took a caffeine pill, because I need them (my therapist in Sweden prescribed them for me). In Finland they didn't get it. I was diagnosed with Asperger's and ADHD when I was 27, in 2007 and only a few years ago they accepted that diagnosis in Finland! They have some serious trust issues in Finland lol. Which reminds me... I have not been hiding the fact that I am like Beyoncé's ex: "To the left, to the left"... This is my right (pun intended) and prerogative! I have been volunteering for the Green party in Finland. I don't think the social democrats in this country are like so much to the left as me, but it's okay. You don't need to agree with me to be my friend, but a HUSBAND?!? Nope. I don't want someone who's, you know... To the right. Sorry, not sorry!  I have gotten a lot of nice co...

 Good morning dear reader(z), That Z only or mostly makes sense to those who have seen my "Cinderella monster" -alter ego videos made with snapchat! ha ha ha! At the end of each video I say: Hugzzz and kisezzz! lol. Yeah, I am weird. But so is my alter ego "The Cinderella monster"... Yesterday I visited the Temple again! This time I went to the Mount Timpanogos Temple. I really like it too. I mean, which Temple wouldn't I love?!? lol. They are all a little different but they are all equally beautiful, each in their own way... Like people!  On Friday I got the opportunity to go to BYU campus. I walked around (without my walker, mind you) over 3000 steps! Wau. I had the walker for over FIVE YEARS. Now I am done with it! :) I am SO happy! This trip has kind of transformed me! I am just a lot happier here. The sun is shining, the people are smiling and it's warm!  I so want to come visit soon again! :) I have visited two temples so far. Hopefully another one nex...

 Dear readers, What's up? My mood. I am feeling so much better than I ever did before this trip. At least a lot better than my average days in Finland... Here it's a bit warm, but the sun is shining, I have things to do, places to go. I have friends to meet and food to eat. lol I am so happy to be here. I gotta admit, the people here are a lot more like me... Finnish people and Swedish speaking Finns are not  lot like me. I didn't fit in in Finland, because I am too kind of lively and I talk and laugh more. I didn't fit in in Sweden, I was too fat and too Finnish. That is so ironic because in Finland I am considered to be too Swedish. Here no one notices me being from another country, I fit in. I am happy here. My health has significantly improved and I have a lot more energy. Guess my mood is dependent of the weather too... Yesterday I met Heaton and Stratford and sis Cope, They are of the original family unit in Finland.  Here are some pictures: I am so grateful for t...

 Good morning dear reader(s)! Reader, yesterday I visited SLC and met my friend Jared, whom I hadn't seen for 22 years! He served his mission in Sweden. We met in the Single's ward in Stockholm (the ward was called SVEA), where he served with my friend Teppo from Finland. Jared and me used to wash all the dishes after each ward dinner. I have very good memories of out friendship through the years. He is so awesome. We ate at one more noodle in China town... My friend Ellinor (she is my friend from Sweden who I am staying at now) also came with us. Today I have "transfers" lol. I am going to BYU and seeing some of my friends after a devotional with Neil L Andersen. I saw them last year on their mission. One of them is our "big brother" and the other one is my bonus son. :) I am happy to know them. They went home last year. So nice people. I told them "next year in Utah!" last time I saw them and I thought, honestly, "Not going to happen, too di...

 Good morning form "beyond the pond"! How are you, reader? LOL. Hopefully doing well. I am almost always very happy in the morning, heart-break or no heart-break. A new morning is always a new morning... Like Anne of Green Gables said:  "Today is fresh, with no mistakes in it" (YET) hahhah! :D Today I am going to the store named Smith's to get some drinks and other digestible things, some sweets like Reese's maybe, nerds or something, and fruits and berries. I am on the hunt for Root beer barrels (hard candies). I don't know yet if they exist anymore... Wish me luck! Yesterday we had a cookie walk with the ward my friend belongs to.  My mom sends me messages on WhatsApp daily, she is checking in so I am still alive and well. Before the flight here I was scared of flying again, because I hadn't flown since 2019! I was a bit "rusty"... But it went well, my feet didn't even get swollen! AMAZING... I am so sorry for mentioning it again, but...

 Good morning!  Yesterday I went to the Temple: Saratoga Springs, with my friend Ellinor. It was so nice.  A few observations of the Temple: It is so BIG! Wau. Also, the people smiled a lot more and also were not at all stressful or anything. I really love the Temple. It is the best place to go when you're sad. Last post was weird, so sorry... I feel often like people misunderstand me on purpose! It is very frustrating. Then they often put unreasonable expectations on me. Like: "CHANGE! NOW! Do this, do that. Your illness is just an excuse!" etc. Well, first of all, I don't have my diagnosis for nothing, you know. If you except perfection from me, you will be very disappointed. I will need to stop waiting for perfect understanding and sympathy from them! That's it! Easy. lol. I am done with people (at times). Also, they tell me not to judge anyone. Then they turn around and judge me. Way to go!  It is easy for me to judge other people who love to judge me and othe...

 Good morning from Pleasant Grove, UTAH!  I have had so much fun here, I always want to remember the good and exciting things that have happened here. Of course, no trip can be complete without some difficulties... I got really heart-broken yesterday. It feels like some "friends" really like to mess things up for me and I also mess things up often. If it doesn't work, it is not meant to be. If the guy you like isn't brave enough to like you because this reason or that, he is not going to be able to withstand all the other "problems" that might occur in a relationship, and I am often too eager and too much of many things, I need a strong, stubborn guy who doesn't choose the easy way out. Someone who sticks by me, doesn't run or hide when some dumb people try to gaslight me and discourage us or something. I am letting go of this situation, give up and let it be. I know that God will see to it that things will go as they are meant to go. I am listening ...

 Good morning everybody! Greetings from Pleasant Grove, Utah. I arrived on Tuesday the 13th of August to the SLC international airport, a little before 1 pm (the flight was early...). I traveled together with the returning missionaries. It was so nice!  I was really tired but I haven't been so tired that I thought I would be. My medicine helps me get my sleep patterns stable and regular. I have been walking a lot and it hurts in the evenings when I have spent a long time walking around. But it's ok. I think I have lost a little more weight, it's so much easier to get around! What a big blessing. A few months I was still in a wheelchair when I went outside! WOW. It is a miracle! :) I took a little break in writing. Hope you don't mind hahhah!  This country is very interesting! :) stores and such have so different "infrastructure", I don't know if that's the right word... And a town or city is not separate or like far from each other. You just kinda swoo...